I have always been jealous of both of my roommates. They both have volumes and volumes of journals that they have kept since they were...um...young. They have records of their thoughts and life-happenings. I've tried multiple versions of this myself and I just can never seem to keep up with it. But...its never too late to start, right? I'm assuming that senior year is going to be one for the books, so here starts my second attempt at blogging.
Summer 2008...oh, my what a summer it has been. Glimpse of the real world, 21st birthday celebrations, heartbreak, uncertainty, and anticipation. phew.
When thinking about my future, I realized that this summer was one in which I needed to buckle down and find a job that will serve to advancing my future. I wanted to find a job that would propel me forward, be a great experience, and that would teach me a million life lessons. Oh boy...was I ever rewarded. I stumbled upon a job with AmeriCorps VISTA. I applied, was interviewed, then hired as a member serving in Delaware, Ohio. I had absolutely no idea what I was about to embark on, but I am so thankful that the opportunity fell into my lap. We had 2 days of training and then were literally thrown out on our own.
I am working with an organization called Andrews House. Andrews House is a "community gathering place." It hosts two free meals monthly, a weekly free medical clinic, a free legal clinic, and is a resident partner of 7 other social service organizations. My main goal while here is to launch Andrews House as an Ohio Benefit Bank site. The Ohio Benefit Bank is a web-based program that connects low-income families with easy access to public benefits (food stamps, medical assistance, child-care assistance, etc). There is 1.6 BILLION dollars set aside for these benefits from the government that goes unused every year because eligible individuals just are not applying. Usually, when a family wants to apply for food stamps or other assistance, they go to Job and Family Services, wait in line, and sometimes just are not treated fairly. The OBB allows people to forgo that first step in the process. It helps those people completely finish benefit applications before they even step foot at JFS. Also, many people simply cannot make it through the application. This program also eliminates that problem. It is counselor-assisted and the program is written at a 4th grade reading level.
So, all-in-all, I've become pretty passionate about this program. I have spent 10 weeks spreading the word (I've presented to approximately 300 people in total) and watching it grow. I have had the privilege of being in contact with people from all different walks of life. Elders, children, poor, wealthy...you name it, we've talked. I have presented at free local meals (many attendees are homeless), and also to all the head "social service" gurus in the area. It really has been a wonderful experience. That being said, it has also shown me that this is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I am still so thankful for the experience and the lessons that it has taught me. It has really opened my eyes to so many things that I had never been exposed to before and for that, I wouldn't change the experience for anything. Its been pretty cool though. I've been in 2 newsletters and a newspaper...not too shabby. Not to mention...it will look fantastic on my resume.
Neeeext...my boyfriend and I broke up in June after dating for a year and a half. I just...wow. I can't even put it all in to words. Worst feeling in the world. Never have I ever cried this much. Never been in so much pain. Never have I learned more...
I am slowly learning to let go of my grip on the future. "Who knows" has been the "it" phrase of the past 4 weeks. I really don't know what is going to happen. I lost my best friend, my first love, and someone that did more for me than any other person in my life (besides possibly my parents...). I don't really know what went wrong...I got scared and something just didn't feel right. Its a hard one to swallow...still. It really was not something that I wanted to do, i'm not exactly glad that I did it, and I never thought it would be like this. It was something that I thought was fair for both of us. I thought that I needed to be on my own for awhile so that I could be more confident in my relationships. I can't imagine the hurt that he feels and its interesting to me that even though we were in it together, our situations are so much different. I miss him so much every minute of every day and I'm not so sure that that will change any time soon. From what I can gather, he has a "moving on" mentality right now, so I'm trying to push myself to do the same. Nothing helps but time...and even that seems to be taking its good old time in helping me.
I'm trying really hard to just take one day at a time and to not have expectations, but that has always been really difficult for me. I tend to be a planner. Life is moving really quickly right now...I am going to be a senior and I'm starting to make really important decisions about the steps I will take after graduation...scary.
"I know theres nothing stopping you now, but I'd settle for a slow down..." Dierks Bentley
So, all-in-all, I've become pretty passionate about this program. I have spent 10 weeks spreading the word (I've presented to approximately 300 people in total) and watching it grow. I have had the privilege of being in contact with people from all different walks of life. Elders, children, poor, wealthy...you name it, we've talked. I have presented at free local meals (many attendees are homeless), and also to all the head "social service" gurus in the area. It really has been a wonderful experience. That being said, it has also shown me that this is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I am still so thankful for the experience and the lessons that it has taught me. It has really opened my eyes to so many things that I had never been exposed to before and for that, I wouldn't change the experience for anything. Its been pretty cool though. I've been in 2 newsletters and a newspaper...not too shabby. Not to mention...it will look fantastic on my resume.
Neeeext...my boyfriend and I broke up in June after dating for a year and a half. I just...wow. I can't even put it all in to words. Worst feeling in the world. Never have I ever cried this much. Never been in so much pain. Never have I learned more...
I am slowly learning to let go of my grip on the future. "Who knows" has been the "it" phrase of the past 4 weeks. I really don't know what is going to happen. I lost my best friend, my first love, and someone that did more for me than any other person in my life (besides possibly my parents...). I don't really know what went wrong...I got scared and something just didn't feel right. Its a hard one to swallow...still. It really was not something that I wanted to do, i'm not exactly glad that I did it, and I never thought it would be like this. It was something that I thought was fair for both of us. I thought that I needed to be on my own for awhile so that I could be more confident in my relationships. I can't imagine the hurt that he feels and its interesting to me that even though we were in it together, our situations are so much different. I miss him so much every minute of every day and I'm not so sure that that will change any time soon. From what I can gather, he has a "moving on" mentality right now, so I'm trying to push myself to do the same. Nothing helps but time...and even that seems to be taking its good old time in helping me.
I'm trying really hard to just take one day at a time and to not have expectations, but that has always been really difficult for me. I tend to be a planner. Life is moving really quickly right now...I am going to be a senior and I'm starting to make really important decisions about the steps I will take after graduation...scary.
"I know theres nothing stopping you now, but I'd settle for a slow down..." Dierks Bentley
1 comment:
yaaaay for blogging again!! it will be like livejournal all over again, except not...
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